Did you ever wake yourself up by laughing in your sleep? I do, quite frequently. Truthfully, without exaggeration, it's at least a few times a year. What can I find that is so amusing? I don't know--I guess I'm easily entertained. I forget most of my dreams but the memorable ones that I do recall are not even remotely tied to reality. Shall I undress my psyche and share them with you? If you are nodding your head right now or yelling "yes" at the computer...you need go no further: I will take pity on you. If you are bored and not the slightest bit interested, skip this part.
As God is my witness, I lie not: I dreamt (yes that is a word...archaic like me but it's still a word!) that a gigantic bright red bunny rabbit was chewing on my sofa. How big was it? Well, it's head was hitting the living room ceiling and no, I didn't watch Harvey and have never seen a pooka. I still remember the crunching sound it made as if it were chomping on carrots. Yes, I did wake up laughing...okay maybe it was more like a chuckle but it did wake me up.
The other dream I remember vividly was more dramatic because it unfolded like a Hitchcock movie. It was night (sorry but "a dark and stormy night" has already been taken). I heard the stomping of many feet and saw a mob chasing a man wearing a black leather jacket. I didn't see the man's face but I saw him run around a corner north by northwest. I followed the crowd with suspicion and found the man cornered in an alley like a notorious criminal. Spellbound, I pushed my way through to see what was going to happen next. I was out of breath and my heart was racing but luckily I didn't have vertigo. The man was panting and had his back to the mob. Were they going to beat him up? Were they going to catch a thief? Then I heard a man leading the group pipe, "Hand it over, buddy!" The man reluctantly turned around with a hand hidden in the breast of his jacket as if he were imitating Napoleon. What did he pull out? You couldn't guess it in a hundred years! It was a pair of red boxer shorts with tiny white hearts on it. Guess who the cornered man was? You might think I'm psycho or one for the birds but it was Jerry Lewis. I swear on the Bible it was. For any Hitchcock fans: sorry that I couldn't fit most of his movies in this paragraph but there are a few names to tantalize you.
If any of you are dream therapists out there you might say that I have a perverted wish to marry Jerry Lewis but unlike the French, I don't even like the guy. Okay, I did watch a few of his movies but that was when he was paired with Dean Martin and eons ago. I did have a fixation with scarlet in both dreams but I have no idea what that means. Maybe you could enlighten me.
All right, that takes care of the real dreams but what about my overactive imagination? Sometimes I wish I could turn it off but there are days when it is on overdrive. I remember many years ago when I went to see Jurassic Park (the first movie) with my Japanese cousin. I had to go tinkle (peepee...I work with little kids a lot--excuse me!) really badly halfway through the movie but held it because I didn't want to miss anything. After the movie was done, I rushed to the restroom and my cousin, like a gentleman, waited patiently for me in the lobby. Now it was bad enough that I had nightmares for two weeks as a result of this movie but when I was in the stall taking care of business, I thought to myself, "gee, a T-Rex's head could fix perfectly here. Where could I go and hide? Those gleaming razor sharp teeth could bite me in half!" Well after minutes of such contemplation, I rejoined him. He noticed that my hands were trembling and asked me what was wrong. I blurted out everything and he looked at me sadly as if I had lost my mind and asked compassionately, "Do you really think like that?" Alas, I was speechless and could only nod my head affirmatively.
So I honestly must rate my dreams and imagination the same: not R for restricted, nor PG for parental guidance but the big "I." What does that mean? Never heard of it before? It means INSANE, but what do I care--as long as it leaves me laughing?
***PS: I will post the top ten dreams (the ones that make me laugh hardest) on my blog. Remember I am not talking about daydreams, fantasies or visions but real dreams. Also keep in mind that this is a G rated website. Feel free to post your comments or add your dreams. I will of course keep your anonymity (especially if it is embarrassing!)***
I hereby make it official: I tag my friends Mel (A Quiet Symphony) and Rebecca (Not so Desperate Housewife) to post their most outrageous dreams!
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3 comments:
You are too funny! Couch eating giant bunny? A mob chasing after boxer shorts? That is some great stuff. At least you can remember your dreams - I don't most of the time. One repetitive dream I had when I was a kid was sliding down sidewalks, like if you're walking around San Francisco and go up a hilly road, then need to go down - you don't walk, you slide. Another was riding on a train that would always try to cross a broken bridge to go from one mountain to the next. I think we could both use dream therapy.
Rebecca, your dreams sound cool and seem to have a lot of movement. There is one dream I've always wanted but never had...to soar like a bird.
That would be a cool dream to have. I'll take on your challenge. I'll have to even see if I can remember 10 dreams, let alone the 10 best. But I will post about my dreams this week.
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