The Power of Forgiveness

You don't have to live many years in life before you are hurt by someone. The more pain we endure should make us impenetrable but we seem quite the opposite and the thin layer of social veneer is easily peeled away by the first offense we encounter. Every new offense is like salt being rubbed into a wound that never fully heals.

We can move or make new friends but we also take our offenses with us. No one can live up to our expectations and sooner or later someone offends us again. You get the picture of the vicious cycle, but I don't want to paint the canvas black because there is hope.

I've learned how to guard myself from being offended. The first step was that I had to get a different perspective: a humble minister taught me my first lesson. He had to deal with the usual squabbles in a church and instead of getting impatient, angry or tired when the barbs were aimed his way, I heard him say many times in counsel meetings..."I give them the benefit of the doubt." He was a cheerful, happy man and lived without taking offense.

The second thing I learned was that hurting people hurt each other. I doubt very much that someone is planning and plotting how to make me miserable. I give them the benefit of the doubt: maybe they are facing pressures and sorrows I know nothing about, maybe they are just having a hard day. If I were having a rotten day, I hope that other people would grant me that freedom also and not judge me too harshly.

The third thing I learned was that I can forgive others because of what Jesus said on the cross when He cried out "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do!" People don't know what they are doing when they hurt one another. They are caught in a trap and do not know how to stop hurting and hurting others.

Unforgiveness doesn't affect the people who hurt us...they may not know anything is wrong while the bitterness and bile collect in our system. I've leaned through hard lessons in life that when I finally release others--I am the one set free.